Attention! Spider-Man Is My Would-be Boyfriend!

I am receiving hate emails in huge numbers since Wednesday, July 5, 2017. These were a gesture to the last blog I wrote which, according to most of my readers, was offensive in nature as the love between them and the love of their life is too strong to be valid with that blog. I am called a “pathetic arrogant/unlovable girl who can never make a boyfriend” by a sling of people in the ever-popping emails. It hurt me a bit. So, to refresh my mood, I went alone for the Spider-Man Homecoming movie. And bam! I realised that Spider-Man is exactly the guy I need as my boyfriend.

He will save my travel time and money. My web-slinger boyfriend can be my best money-saving transport. All I have to do is cling to him and I reach office or anywhere on time with no traffic blues at all.

We are also a pair made in heaven. Since I am a journalist and he is a freelance photographer, we can actually coordinate. You see, while I will do the news reporting part, he will be the cameraperson. So, we basically can work in the same office. Isn't it sweet?

And wow, unlike many other superheroes, he wears his underwear inside and not over his costume. And that’s the very reason I can brag that I am Spider-Man’s girlfriend. So, no hiding my boyfriend from my friends and other people who would have made fun of my boyfriend’s bad fashion choice.

He can fetch me things. See, I am a lazy person who wants everything close-by so I don’t have to move much from my spot. So, what if I sat for a movie on the sofa and left the popcorn on the table? My dearest Spidey will shoot his web and get it for me.
Example--
Me- "Get me the coke, Peter."
Peter/Spidey- "Sure. *Zoop, zoop* Here it is."
Me- "Yayy!"

And since in my previous blog I pointed out that a 21st-century boyfriend can literally do anything for his girlfriend, I may request him hard to get me a superhero identity as well—a thing I dreamt of since childhood. I am already thinking my alter ego name(Uh, Indisputable Girl?! Too big, duh!).

Anyway, Spider-Man seems like a trusted, long-term type of boyfriend. Let me know when he gets over MJ or Gwen Stacy, then I will woo him.